Bible Study - Grief - Balance Grief with Hope - John 11 - April 3, 2011

Bible Study – Maze of Grief – Balance Grief with Hope – April 3, 2011

This begins a new series of study entitled “Negotiating the Maze of Grief.”
Our scripture is John 11:20-27, 32-36, 43-44.

We begin a new series of study on grief. People grieve in many ways. We grieve over the loss of something material or relational which we consider valuable, such as a legal paper, lottery ticket, a ring, a picture, a house, a job, a person, divorce, unfaithfulness, the death of a child or spouse, a pet, a friendship and the list goes on. Of these, losing a person is the most difficult loss with which to contend. We can lose people through mysterious circumstances, arguments, divorce and death. It is grievous when we lose a loved one through death, especially a child. Our study for this month will focus upon a variety of scriptures. During times of grief, are we as Christians drawn closer to GOD through CHRIST or do we retreat and blame or curse GOD?


Christians must keep in mind that GOD is sovereign. Realizing the sovereignty of GOD gives us hope. The Bible states in Isaiah 55:8-9:
8 “For My thoughts are not your thoughts, and your ways are not My ways.” [This is]* the LORD’s declaration.
9 “For as heaven is higher than earth, so My ways are higher than your ways, and My thoughts than your thoughts.


GOD is GOD and HE is omniscient, omnipresent and omnipotent and that is why HE is sovereign. People are myopic, selfish and self-serving. GOD is love and responds with the best interest of the person and his/her loved ones in mind. Does this take the sting out of death? NO!!! Grief is a natural response to losing a loved one in death. In Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 we find the “The Mystery of Time”:


1 There is an occasion for everything, and a time for every activity under heaven: 2 a time to give birth and a time to die; a time to plant and a time to uproot;[1]3 a time to kill and a time to heal; a time to tear down and a time to build; 4 a time to weep and a time to laugh; a time to mourn and a time to dance; 5 a time to throw stones and a time to gather stones;[2]a time to embrace and a time to avoid embracing; 6 a time to search and a time to count as lost; a time to keep and a time to throw away; 7 a time to tear and a time to sew; a time to be silent and a time to speak; 8 a time to love and a time to hate; a time for war and a time for peace.

We need to keep in mind that death is the result of sin. When man sinned, death and decay entered into the world. GOD intended for mankind to live in a perpetual Garden of Eden. Because man sinned, death entered the world. HE knew that the consequences of sin would be eternal death for mankind. GOD had a plan before HE created the world to redeem mankind from eternal death. GOD allowed HIS ONLY SON, JESUS to leave heaven and come to earth, be born, live as a human and give HIS life through the shedding of HIS blood to redeem all who would believe on HIM. JESUS had the freedom to choose to sin or to remain sinless. HE was tempted in all ways as humans. HE remained sinless and thus was the perfect sacrifice to pay for the sins of mankind. HIS shed blood paid for and broke the sin barrier between man and GOD. All any person has to do is believe that HE gave HIS life for him/her - ask HIM for forgiveness and to come into his/her life. When a person does that he/she is born into GOD’S family forever. This is the miracle of being born-again.


It is difficult for most of us to see the value in tragedy - only GOD from HIS vantage point knows the end result of a tragedy.


I remember years ago getting very upset over the death of a person a number of us had been praying for. This was during what I refer to as my adolescent Spiritual period when I thought GOD had to answer all of my prayers according to my request. In fact, we (a small group of Christians) had prayed for several people and they all had died and I had had enough. It was time for the great Spiritual me to have a serious talk with GOD. Well, I did and when I shut up HE had a few words for me.


I told GOD how upset I was with HIM about these people dying. HE let me finish my lecture. I will give you the modified version. HE said, “Do you recall a certain person who we had been praying for?” I said, “Yes.” This lady had cancer and died. HE said, “I did not want her to have cancer but she was willing to endure cancer if it fit into MY plan and glorified ME.” This lady had received treatment for cancer but it had not worked. This was a number of years ago and treatment has advanced since then. Of course, I believe GOD could have healed her. She was a wonderful Christian lady. HE said, “She was willing to give her life serving ME, whatever the cost to her. Only eternity will reveal the lives of doctors, nurses, friends and those who met her that she touched because of her witness during this time. She was like a missionary who had been captured by a hostile tribe and given her life for ME. She was like a martyr and when she died, I met her and said, “Well done good and faithful servant.” We turned and walked down the streets of gold that were lined with the saints cheering for her because she had remained faithful and she had overcome.” Then HE asked me a question. “Would you deny that to anyone?” In shame, I responded. “NO.” GOD has prepared a homecoming that far exceeds our wildest imagination for those who faithfully follow HIM to the end.

I know this is my encounter and I know it is hard to accept someone else’s experience because it is not backed up with scripture. So take it as information.


Our scripture focuses upon JESUS raising Lazarus from the dead. We need to begin with some background scripture leading into this event which is found in John 11:1-19:  Lazarus Dies at Bethany
1 Now a man was sick, Lazarus, from Bethany, the village of Mary and her sister Martha. 2 Mary was the one who anointed the Lord with fragrant oil and wiped His feet with her hair,[1] and it was her brother Lazarus who was sick. 3 So the sisters sent a message to Him: “Lord, the one You love is sick.” 4 When Jesus heard it, He said, “This sickness will not end in death but is for the glory of God, so that the Son of God may be glorified through it.” 5 (Jesus loved Martha, her sister, and Lazarus.) 6 So when He heard that he was sick, He stayed two more days in the place where He was. 7 Then after that, He said to the disciples, “Let’s go to Judea again.” 8 “• Rabbi,” the disciples told Him, “just now the Jews tried to stone You, and You’re going there again?” 9 “Aren’t there 12 hours in a day?” Jesus answered. “If anyone walks during the day, he doesn’t stumble, because he sees the light of this world. 10 If anyone walks during the night, he does stumble, because the light is not in him.” 11 He said this, and then He told them, “Our friend Lazarus has fallen • asleep, but I’m on My way to wake him up.” 12 Then the disciples said to Him, “Lord, if he has fallen asleep, he will get well.” 13 Jesus, however, was speaking about his death, but they thought He was speaking about natural sleep. 14 So Jesus then told them plainly, “Lazarus has died. 15 I’m glad for you that I wasn’t there so that you may believe. But let’s go to him.” 16 Then Thomas (called “Twin”) said to his fellow disciples, “Let’s go so that we may die with Him.”


The Resurrection and the Life
17 When Jesus arrived, He found that Lazarus had already been in the tomb four days. 18 Bethany was near Jerusalem (about two miles[2] away). 19 Many of the Jews had come to Martha and Mary to comfort them about their brother.


JESUS was friends of Lazarus and his sisters Martha and Mary. They had a close relationship. Lazarus became ill. Mary and Martha sent word to JESUS that Lazarus was sick.


JESUS and these three (3) had a close bond of love. JESUS had the power to heal and was HE tempted to heal Lazarus? We do not know but we have to keep in mind that JESUS was tempted in all ways as we are. We do know that JESUS was obedient to the FATHER’S commands. Although JESUS had the power to heal HIS friend, HE knew that GOD had a higher purpose for this event and HE would trust HIS FATHER. When GOD is in control, we wait as HE instructs. But often waiting is very difficult. We want to take matters into our own hands and when we do, often we take them out of GOD’S hands.


JESUS had been preaching across the Jordon River in the area known as Perea. Lazarus lived in Bethany which was about two (2) miles from Jerusalem. JESUS delayed going to Lazarus for two (2) days. JESUS used this event as a teaching moment for HIS disciples and for others. JESUS spoke of walking in the light of GOD versus walking in the darkness of the Satan and the world. When a person walks in the light of CHRIST, he/she can see clearly the road ahead and will not stumble. Satan blinds and uses the darkness to cause people to stumble and doubt GOD’S sovereignty. Satan wants people to walk by what they see and know but GOD wants HIS children to walk by faith and allow HIM to be their guiding light. Day represents the knowledge of GOD’S will. Darkness represents the absence of knowledge of GOD’S will.


JESUS made it clear to HIS disciples that Lazarus was dead. JESUS arrived near the home of Lazarus and his sisters four (4) days after Lazarus was buried. Why four (4) days after his burial? The Jews believed that the spirit of the dead person stayed near the body for three (3) days after death. JESUS arrived when Lazarus had been in the grave for four (4) days so that all who would witness the upcoming miracle would know Lazarus was truly dead. His revivification (new life) would be the result of GOD’S power through HIM. Our focus scripture picks up the unfolding event.


Let’s read John 11:20-27:
20 As soon as Martha heard that Jesus was coming, she went to meet Him. But Mary remained seated in the house. 21 Then Martha said to Jesus, “Lord, if You had been here, my brother wouldn’t have died. 22 Yet even now I know that whatever You ask from God, God will give You.” 23 “Your brother will rise again,” Jesus told her. 24 Martha said, “I know that he will rise again in the resurrection at the last day.” 25 Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in Me, even if he dies, will live. 26 Everyone who lives and believes in Me will never die—ever. Do you believe this?” 27 “Yes, Lord,” she told Him, “I believe You are the • Messiah, the Son of God, who was to come into the world.”


What a powerful teachable moment. Martha went to JESUS. When tragedy happens, we need to go to JESUS because HE is the One Who is the “Resurrection and the Life.” This fact brings comfort those who grieve in times of death. GOD had given permission to JESUS to use the death and revivification of Lazarus to confirm HIS authority over death. This event occurred shortly before JESUS would begin HIS journey to the cross.


We see the faith that Martha had in JESUS. She saw and knew HIM as the true Messiah. JESUS likely wanted to hear her witness to the faith that HE knew was in her heart about HIM. There was no doubt in her heart that if JESUS had arrived while Lazarus was still alive, HE would have healed her brother. JESUS knew that but HE also knew that healing was one thing but giving life to a stinking corpus was quite another. Giving life to a stinking corpus reveals the total authority and power given to JESUS by GOD.


These were friends of JESUS and HE knew their hearts but they needed to confirm their faith in HIM in this time of need.


Let’s read John 11:32-36:
32 When Mary came to where Jesus was and saw Him, she fell at His feet and told Him, “Lord, if You had been here, my brother would not have died!” 33 When Jesus saw her crying, and the Jews who had come with her crying, He was angry[3] in His spirit and deeply moved. 34 “Where have you put him?” He asked. “Lord,” they told Him, “come and see.” 35 Jesus wept. 36 So the Jews said, “See how He loved him!” 37 But some of them said, “Couldn’t He who opened the blind man’s eyes also have kept this man from dying?”


Mary also came to JESUS and she fell at HIS feet. Mary, like her sister, told JESUS, “If HE had been there her brother would not have died.” This revealed the attitude of Mary’s heart.


Mary fell at the feet of JESUS. People grieve in different ways. Mary fell at the feet of JESUS as an act of worship and seeking comfort from the ONE Who she knew could comfort her. It is interesting that when JESUS saw her crying and the Jews who had come with her crying, JESUS became angry in HIS Spirit. Why did JESUS get angry in HIS SPIRIT? Something caused JESUS to weep. The Jews thought it was the result of HIS friend Lazarus dying and HE couldn’t do anything about it. The Jews were questioning the authority of JESUS. But little did they know that GOD had arranged this meeting to reveal the truth about JESUS’ authority. JESUS wept because of their unbelief and because sin robs people of the life GOD intended for them.


Notice in verse 37 that the Jews began questioning the authority and power of JESUS that came from GOD. Oh, HE could heal the blind but HE could not keep HIS friend from dying. Notice the sarcasm and desire to cast doubt upon the authority of JESUS. As Paul Harvey used to say, “Now for the rest of the story.”


We need to fill in with some additional scripture form John 11:38 -42:
The Seventh Sign: Raising Lazarus from the Dead
38 Then Jesus, angry in Himself again, came to the tomb. It was a cave, and a stone was lying against it. 39 “Remove the stone,” Jesus said. Martha, the dead man’s sister, told Him, “Lord, he already stinks. It’s been four days.” 40 Jesus said to her, “Didn’t I tell you that if you believed you would see the glory of God?” 41 So they removed the stone. Then Jesus raised His eyes and said, “Father, I thank You that You heard Me. 42 I know that You always hear Me, but because of the crowd standing here I said this, so they may believe You sent Me.”


Notice JESUS was angry again. HE was angry at the unbelief of the Jews and angry at sin, which robs people of their life. HE instructed some of the people to remove the stone lying against the entrance to the cave where they had buried Lazarus. Martha told JESUS, “He stinks because he has been dead for four (4) days.” Yuk!!! A dead body has a unique odor and it is not an odor you want to smell.


JESUS assured Martha that HE was the authority over the situation. She must continue to trust HIM. This is a message to us. When things seem hopeless, it is the time Christians must trust in JESUS. HE is the authority over all things. This event is a powerful message to all Christians that since CHRIST has the power and authority to raise the stinking/decaying physically dead, HE has the power and authority to raise the Spiritually dead and give those who believe in HIM eternal life.


JESUS prayed to HIS FATHER, so that all within hearing distance could know that HIS authority and power came from GOD. Those hearing HIS prayer would remember it and tell others about it. The lives of those witnessing this event would be impacted. Some believed in HIM and others used this event to become more determined to see that JESUS was put to death.


HIS words still reverberate in the hearts and minds of all who read this scripture or hear about this event today - “Didn’t I tell you that if you believed you would see the glory of God?” 41 So they removed the stone. Then Jesus raised His eyes and said, “Father, I thank You that You heard Me. 42 I know that You always hear Me, but because of the crowd standing here I said this, so they may believe You sent Me.”


Let’s read John 11:43-44:
43 After He said this, He shouted with a loud voice, “Lazarus, come out!” 44 The dead man came out bound hand and foot with linen strips and with his face wrapped in a cloth. Jesus said to them, “Loose him and let him go.”


JESUS prayed to the FATHER and HE raised Lazarus from the dead. All JESUS had to do was to ask him to come out. Some Bible scholars believe that JESUS called Lazarus by name because if HE hadn’t, then all of the dead would have been raised. JESUS commanded them to loose Lazarus from the grave clothes. JESUS is the ONE who can loose the shackles of sin and its' consequences, which is death, from our minds. HE gave HIS life that all who believe in HIM will be set free from the bondage of sin and receives the gift of eternal life.


Have you made that decision in your life? If not, please do so right now. Ask CHRIST to forgive you of your sins and to come into your life now. This life upon earth is brief but eternity is never ending.


JESUS said in John 10:10:
10 The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.


Once the shackles of death are removed from our minds, through the rebirth, only CHRIST can give life that becomes more abundant. Do we still grieve when we lose a loved one? YES, because it is normal. It is therapeutic to grieve. During the grieving process and beyond, our hope is in CHRIST, HIS resurrection and HIS promise of eternal life to all who believe in HIM.


JESUS still weeps over those who reject HIM. John 3:16-18 says it best: 16 “For God loved the world in this way: He gave His • One and Only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him will not perish but have eternal life.[10] 17 For God did not send His Son into the world that He might condemn the world, but that the world might be saved through Him. 18 Anyone who believes in Him is not condemned, but anyone who does not believe is already condemned, because he has not believed in the name of the • One and Only Son of God.