Marriage - I Take You - Genesis 2, Malachi 2, Matthew 19 - May 9, 2010

Bible Study – Marriage – “I Take You” – May 9, 2010

This is lesson two (2) in our series “I Still Do.”

Our scripture is Genesis 2:23-25; Malachi 2:13-15; Matthew 19:3-12.

Men, why is it important that you love your wife? The Apostle Peter gave us one answer.

1 Peter 3:7:

7 Husbands, in the same way, live with your wives with understanding of their weaker nature[6] Lit understanding as the weaker vessel yet showing them honor as co-heirs of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered.

Men, do you want to be a man of prayer and a prayer warrior? Then one key ingredient is to love your wife and honor her. There is a relationship between our marriage and our relationship with GOD.

GOD made a suitable mate for man by taking a body part from him. Adam was just waking up from the deep sleep GOD had put him into to remove his body part to make Eve when GOD brought her to him. Just as fathers present their daughters to their groom, GOD presented Eve to her groom. Adam was seeing his new mate for the first time. Here was his response.

Let’s read Genesis 2:23-25:

23 And the man said: This one, at last, is bone of my bone, and flesh of my flesh; this one will be called woman, for she was taken from man.[22] Eph 5:28–30 24 This is why a man leaves his father and mother and bonds with his wife, and they become one flesh.[23] Mal 2:15 25 Both the man and his wife were naked, yet felt no shame.
This to me is a precious moment. In our last lesson we considered GOD’S formation of man and HIM taking a body part from Adam to make Eve because a suitable helpmate could not be found for Adam. GOD caused a deep sleep to come over Adam and GOD made Eve. Adam awakens and GOD showed him what HE had made for him. GOD, THE FATHER presented Eve to Adam. Fathers still present their daughters to their husbands, when possible. Grooms still find their brides amazing just as when GOD presented Eve to Adam. Adam’s eyes blared wide open and he in essence exclaimed “WOW!!!” this is what I have been looking for and wanting. I just did not know it. She is bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh.

Who loves us more than any other human besides our parents? We love ourselves. Adam views a piece of himself fashioned into a female body and it was love at first sight. This is GOD’S ideal for one’s spouse. We are one in the flesh and we need to treat our spouses as we would treat our own flesh.

Adam had named all the animals and now he named GOD’S final masterpiece woman
because she was taken from him.

We can question, if Eve was taken from Adam would their DNA be the same? Isn’t that a problem? Here is what came to mind when I raised this question - We need to keep in mind that this occurred before sin and decay came into the world. The world was in a pristine state; therefore, different reproductive dynamics were in effect which makes sense to me. The point is that GOD took care of what needed to be taken care in order to produce and reproduce mankind through marriage. GOD does not make junk.

Because GOD took a body part from Adam to make Eve, GOD’S plan was for the two parts to come back together in a bond of love through marriage to become completed as one. GOD intended for males and females through the mystery of marriage to become one body in harmony and unity with each other and with GOD.

They realized that they were naked but were not ashamed. Being naked was natural because we are not embarrassed when we see our naked body. Since the bond of marriage produces one, seeing our mate naked is the same as viewing our own body. The Bible also tells us that our body belongs to our spouse and our spouse’s body belongs to us in 1 Corinthians 7:4:

4 A wife does not have authority over her own body, but her husband does. Equally, a husband does not have authority over his own body, but his wife does.

I know where some men’s minds are going with this but keep in mind that you are to respect your wife and consider her. By the same token ladies consider your husband’s needs. Talk to each other and come to a mutual understanding of each other’s needs.

Let’s go to the Old Testament to see the relationship of marriage and its influence on a person’s relationship with GOD.

Let’s read Malachi 2:13-15:

13 And this is another thing you do: you cover the Lord’s altar with tears, with weeping and groaning, because He no longer respects your offerings or receives [them]* The bracketed text has been added for clarity. gladly[18] 1 Kg 8:28–30; Isa 56:7 from your hands. 14 Yet you ask, “For what reason?” Because the Lord witnessed the covenant you made with the wife of your youth. You have acted treacherously against her,[19] Pr 2:16–17; Isa 54:6 though she was your marriage partner and your wife by covenant. 15 Didn’t the one [God]* The bracketed text has been added for clarity. make [us]* The bracketed text has been added for clarity. with a remnant of His life-breath? And what does the One seek?[20] Or Did the One not make them? So their flesh and spirit belong to Him, or No one who does this even has a remnant of the Spirit in him; Hb obscure A godly • offspring. So watch yourselves carefully,[21] Lit So guard yourselves in your spirit and do not act treacherously against the wife of your youth.

The prophet Malachi was the last Old Testament Prophet, about 430 B.C. The temple in Jerusalem had been rebuilt for about 100 years but the people were losing their interest in worship. The people’s lack of interest in worship was compounded by the fact that the priests had developed a casual attitude toward GOD. It appears that both the people and the priests had become apathetic and disillusioned about the coming of the promised Messiah. The Messianic prophesies given by GOD through the prophets Isaiah, Jeremiah and Micah had not been fulfilled. The people in essence had given up on GOD sending them the promised Messiah and had become apathetic.
Also, living in the same area were people of other cultures and religions. The Jewish men began being unfaithful to their wives, divorcing their wives and marrying the pagan women. First, this broke covenant with the wives of their youth and with GOD. Second, this mixed culture/religious arrangement compromised the way any offspring produced from these pagan relationships would be raised to honor the one true GOD. This was vital for the future of the Jewish people because it was during a time when GOD was bringing HIS people back to rebuild Jerusalem and their relationship to HIM. They had been in exile because of their disobedience and had repented and were rebuilding their lives but now they going astray. GOD would punish those who were compromising their relationship with HIM.

Malachi was a messenger of GOD. HIS message through Malachi was “I have loved you!” “But you ask, ‘How have YOU loved us?’ The Israelites wanted to know why GOD had turned HIS back on them and was rejecting their offerings. It was because the people had hardened their hearts such that they could not see their own sin. They had hardened their hearts toward GOD and were disobeying HIS commands about marriage. They were breaking covenant with the wives of their youth and with GOD.

They had a spiritual heart problem.

The Prophet Malachi gave the people the words of GOD. Malachi 2:10-12 helps us see the main problem with the Israelites:

10 Don’t all of us have one Father?[9] Mal 1:6; Isa 63:16; Hs 11:1 Didn’t one God create us?[10] Dt 32:6; Isa 43:1–7; 64:8 Why then do we act treacherously against one another, profaning the covenant of our fathers?[11] Mal 1:12; Ps 55:20; 89:34 11 Judah has acted treacherously, and a detestable thing has been done in Israel and in Jerusalem. For Judah has profaned the Lord’s sanctuary,[12] Or profaned what is holy to the Lord [13] Ezk 44:7 which He loves, and has married the daughter of a foreign god.[14] = a woman who worshiped a foreign god; Nm 21:29 [15] Dt 7:3–4; Ezr 9:1–2,10–14; Neh 13:23–30 12 To the man who does this, may the Lord cut off any descendants[16] One Hb ms, LXX, DSS read off one witnessing or answering [17] Lit off one waking or answering; Hb obscure from the tents of Jacob, even if they present an offering to the Lord of Hosts.

The people had sinned against GOD by marrying foreign women, who worshipped other gods. The men had compromised themselves with GOD. They were still coming to the temple and giving an offering but their hearts were not pure before GOD and GOD was rejecting their offering. They could not understand why GOD was rejecting them and their offering. They were crying over the altar because they did not understand. But all of their crying did not change their hard hearts. They wanted to do things their way.

GOD made it clear that it was all about how they were treating the wives of their youth. They broke covenant with the wife of their youth and by doing so they also broke covenant with GOD.

You often hear men say in mid-life crisis that they have found their soul mate or GOD brought us together. These are Satan’s lies. GOD’S desire is for you to remain with the wife of your youth and work through this time in your life or the life of your wife. Will it be easy? NO!!! But with GOD’S help, HE will help you get through it and it will be well worth the effort because your original marriage may end up stronger than ever. You may think that this soul mate relationship is wonderful but wait until the new wears off and you deal with a blended family and its complications. I know there are exceptions to all situations. But I know a number of men with whom I have spoken have said, “I wish I had never left my first wife.” Again, there are exceptions.

Men or women do not place yourselves in situations where you can yield to temptation if the opportunity presents itself. If you find yourself in such a situation, then run to safety. It is not worth the moment and can lead to breaking barriers that compromise your values and relationship with GOD. Your relationship with GOD can be restored much easier than with your spouse. GOD forgets the sins that we confess and buries them in deepest part of the sea but your spouse is another matter and rightfully so because he/she has been cut to the bone.

The Book of Hosea is a classic example of the covenant relationship between GOD and HIS chosen people. GOD used the marriage of the Prophet Hosea to Gomer to illustrate HIS covenant relationship with the Israelites. GOD wanted to give the Israelites an example to show the extent of HIS love for HIS chosen people. This includes Christians today. It shows the extent of GOD’S love and the extent HE will go to for our sake or the sake of a nation in covenant with HIM.

GOD is faithful in honoring a covenant with HIS people. Covenant means an oath-bound promise or a binding relationship. GOD’S message through the Prophet Hosea was that GOD honors HIS covenant with HIS people regardless of what HIS people do. HE may punish them for being disobedient but HE never leaves them or forsakes them.

This is HIS expectation for marriage because it is a covenant relationship between male and female as witnessed by GOD.

Let’s read Matthew 19:3-12:

3 Some • Pharisees approached Him to test Him. They asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife on any grounds?” 4 “Haven’t you read,” He replied, “that He who created[1] Other mss read made them in the beginning made them male and female,[2] Gn 1:27; 5:2 5 and He also said: For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two will become one flesh?[3] Gn 2:24 6 So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, man must not separate.” 7 “Why then,” they asked Him, “did Moses command [us]* The bracketed text has been added for clarity. to give divorce papers and to send her away?” 8 He told them, “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because of the hardness of your hearts. But it was not like that from the beginning. 9 And I tell you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.”[4] Other mss add Also whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery; Mt 5:32 10 His disciples said to Him, “If the relationship of a man with his wife is like this, it’s better not to marry!” 11 But He told them, “Not everyone can accept this saying, but only those it has been given to. 12 For there are eunuchs who were born that way from their mother’s womb, there are eunuchs who were made by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves that way because of the kingdom of heaven. Let anyone accept this who can.”

JESUS was getting close to the last days of HIS earthly ministry. The Pharisees were trying to trap HIM by asking HIM a question regarding divorce.

There were two (2) schools of thought regarding divorce based upon Deuteronomy 24:1:

1 “If a man marries a woman, but she becomes displeasing to him because he finds something improper about her, he may write her a divorce certificate, hand it to her, and send her away from his house.

There were two (2) important Jewish teachers with two (2) different teachings on divorce based upon their interpretation of the words “something improper.” The Jewish teacher Hillel taught that “something improper” meant almost anything displeasing to the husband, such as burning the toast or not making the bed properly, was grounds for divorce. The other Jewish teacher Shammai taught that “something improper” was adultery. The basis for his teaching came from the fact the Hebrew phrase “something improper” means “matter of nakedness.” Thus, he concluded that the phrase referred to adultery as the only reason for divorce.

Guess which teacher most Jewish males liked? Of course, it was Hillel. The Pharisees asked JESUS the question “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife on any grounds?” In other words, who do YOU support Hillel or Shammai. If HE answered the question supporting either teacher, HE would offend one of the groups who followed one of the teachers.

JESUS goes back to Genesis. GOD made one man and one woman. GOD did not make one male and several females with the intent of being united in marriage for the purpose of reproducing. GOD intended for them to be united as one in a covenant relationship. This was before Adam and Eve sinned, therefore, HIS original intent was for them to be together for all eternity. When sin came into earth, so did death. Does that mean that we will be married in heaven? JESUS answered that question in

Matthew 22:29-30:

29 Jesus answered them, “You are deceived, because you don’t know the Scriptures or the power of God. 30 For in the resurrection they neither marry nor are given in marriage but are like[9] Other mss add God’s angels in heaven.

The Pharisees posed another question based upon JESUS’ answer. In essence, the Pharisees were saying, “If GOD intended for a couple to be married forever, why did Moses, GOD’S right hand man, permit divorce?” JESUS went to heart of the matter. The people had a spiritual heart problem with GOD and with the relationship they had with their wives. JESUS turned the tables on the men. You can turn your wife out for frivolous things, if you choose but GOD will consider it adultery when you marry another woman. If your wife has been unfaithful to you then you have grounds to consider divorce. The Greek word used for “sexual morality” is “porneia” which means every kind of unlawful sexual intercourse and includes incest, homosexuality, prostitution and molestation.

JESUS’ disciples were listening to what JESUS was telling the Pharisees. Their thoughts were, “Gee, maybe men should not marry.” JESUS said that was a consideration but the person choosing not to marry should consider whether or not he/she would be able to hold out because of their hormones and sexual desires.
JESUS implied that GOD can lead some men or women into a life of celibacy. When GOD calls a person to celibacy, HE gives him/her the power to endure. If you can be dedicated to GOD, serve HIM and not burn with desire, then do not marry. However, if you find yourself climbing the walls, then you need to marry. But be careful in choosing your mate because GOD intends for marriage to be for life.

JESUS speaks of eunuchs. The Greek word for eunuch means an “emasculated man.” It includes those who are perfectly capable of marriage and sexual relations but they choose to refrain. Some eunuchs are born eunuchs because they are impotent from birth. Some are made eunuchs by being castrated by man. Some have made themselves eunuchs either by being castrated or choosing to remain celibate.
JESUS agreed with marriage or for a person to remain single. There are responsibilities and expectations for either choice.

The Apostle Paul addressed the struggle a married person has over a single person when it comes to obediently serving the LORD. In 1 Corinthians 7:32-35:
32 I want you to be without concerns. An unmarried man is concerned about the things of the Lord—how he may please the Lord. 33 But a married man is concerned about the things of the world—how he may please his wife— 34 and he is divided. An unmarried woman or a virgin is concerned about the things of the Lord, so that she may be holy both in body and in spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the things of the world—how she may please her husband. 35 Now I am saying this for your own benefit, not to put a restraint on you, but because of what is proper, and so that you may be devoted to the Lord without distraction.

When GOD formed Adam and made Eve from a body part of Adam HE separated them. Adam had a missing part. Through the mystery of marriage when men and women come together in marriage, they are reunited into one. Men and women, it is vital that you seek GOD’S guidance in choosing your mate. Living together for a trial run is not the answer. Having sex outside of marriage is not the answer because you run the risk of having a child or children and then you may be forced into a marriage. Women, why do you think you have to jump in bed with a guy you hardly know and run the risk of a sexually transmitted disease and/or getting pregnant? I know it is competition with those who are promiscuous. They think if they don’t have sex the guy will move on to another and he probably will. Then, I ask you, is that love? Or is it lust and notches on the wall of his mind? Fantastic sex is not what makes a marriage.
If you have ended up in a bad situation, GOD forgives when you repent and ask HIM to forgive you. Just remember repentance means to stop doing what you are doing and follow GOD through a new life in CHRIST. GOD can take a bad marriage and help both of you make it into a good marriage. But allow HIM to do the rebuilding through each of you as you build a loving, intimate relationship with HIM. As each of you is drawn closer to HIM, you will draw closer to each other. Allow CHRIST to be the head of your household.

Just keep in mind that even when CHRIST is the head of your household, you cannot park your brain. You must work together to build your marriage as you both seek the fullness of HIM in your lives. Communicate with each other and work together keeping in mind to care for your mate as you would your own body because your mate’s body belongs to you and is your responsibility.

This is why you must not be unequally yoked spiritually. Christians must marry Christians. The sad thing is that there are as many Christian divorces as there are non-Christian divorces. Why? Could it be that our hearts are hard toward GOD and we have become disillusioned with being a Christian?

I know there are bad situations even in Christian marriages. And there are times that divorce is the right thing to do. But GOD’S ideal is for marriage to be until death do us part. Blessings to all who are struggling with decisions to marry, divorce or whatever the situation may be. May our LORD reveal the path HE wants you to take.

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY TO ALL THE MOTHERS AND FUTURE MOTHERS - BLESSINGS