Bible Study - Distinct (4) - Distinct in My Relationships - Matthew 5:27-32 - February 14, 2016

Bible Study – Distinct (4) – Distinct in My Relationships – February 14, 2016

This is lesson four (4) in our series entitled “Distinct: Living above the Norm.”

Our focus scripture is Matthew 5:27-32.

Hold on to purity at all costs.  

JESUS teaches Christian living in HIS message referred to as the “Sermon on the mount.” HIS message emphasizes that Christians are to be distinct and live noticeably different lives than the norm. It is vital that this distinct living come from the indwelling power of the Holy Spirit and for it to be a natural outflow of the indwelling Holy Spirit.  Trying to live the Christian life in one’s own strength is impossible and tiring. That is why it must come from a life that has been changed and is empowered by the indwelling Holy Spirit through the renewing of the mind.

In Matthew 5:3-12, JESUS began HIS teaching by focusing on the character of HIS followers.

In Matthew 5:13-20, JESUS instructed HIS followers by commanding them to make their influence count for what matters, making them distinct in their influence.

In Matthew 5:20, JESUS concluded this portion of HIS message by stressing that the “greater righteousness” of those who follow HIM should surpass that of the scribes and Pharisee.

In Matthew 5:21-48, JESUS explained that “greater righteousness” can be a way of life only by having the right heart. HE addressed six examples from the Law and revealed what GOD intended for those laws to do in the hearts of HIS children - Murder Begins in the Heart, Adultery in the Heart, Divorce Practices Censured, Tell the Truth, Go the Second Mile and Love Your Enemies. Life is a partnership with GOD as we journey through life and our thought life is vital to this relationship.

In Matthew 5:48, JESUS admonished Christians to “be perfect, even as your heavenly Father is perfect. That is impossible without the indwelling Holy Spirit but JESUS knew what was going to happen in a short time.

This week’s study focuses on the heart of Christians regarding sex and marriage.

Life is complex and entails many attitudes and natures. Our ancestral heritage opens us up to certain inclinations and proclivities. Our relationships with friends can be a good or a bad influence on our lives. Hormones play a role. 

All of these plus many other influences shape our physical lives and natures.

Accepting CHRIST as our Savior gives the opportunity for the indwelling Holy Spirit to rewire our minds through the renewing of our minds. Romans 12:1-2:

1 Therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, I urge you to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God; this is your spiritual worship. 

2 Do not be conformed to this age, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may discern what is the good, pleasing, and perfect will of God.

Why do I say “gives the opportunity?” Our will can override the will of the Father. Christians must yield their wills to the Father, which is dying to self. 

The process of sanctification is designed to help us become more like CHRIST.

GOD knows it is a process and certain issues have to be brought to our conscience minds. Thus, the teaching of JESUS focused on the heart from which springs both good and bad attributes, of which, only the Holy Spirit can bring them under the authority and accountability of GOD as we allow.

When we, as humans, seek a relationship with GOD through religious practices, we tend to focus on the mechanical and not the deeper things that are harbored in our hearts, such as lust being equal to adultery or hatred being equal to murder, etc. Failing to recognize and acknowledge these attitudes hidden in our hearts, leaves them to develop, fester, grow and eventually result in inappropriate action especially for Christians.  JESUS focused on the heart or the core of a person who desires to be an obedient follower of HIM.

All Christians are sinners saved by GOD’S Grace through faith in GOD’S Only Son, JESUS. Christians can become self-righteous because we follow the letter of the Law and Commandments but fail to obey the Spirit of them. JESUS’ message is to every Christian. Let’s explore!

Let’s read Matthew 5:27-30:

Adultery in the Heart

27 "You have heard that it was said, Do not commit adultery. 

This was a general teaching in Judaism. Many prided themselves on never committing such an act. However, JESUS goes deeper.

Adultery refers to a married person having sex with another person. Fornication is generally used when referring to sex between unmarried people. Adultery and fornication were both tied to the worship of pagan gods. For those in covenant with GOD becoming involved with pagan gods was an adulterous act because covenant with GOD was broken. GOD looks upon marriage as a covenant made in the presence HIM and must be honored as HE honors HIS covenants through thick and thin.

JESUS is about to burst the balloon of the pious religious leaders.

28 But I tell you, everyone who looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 

Notice that JESUS speaks with authority “I tell you.” Typically the Jewish teachers referred to some other authority such as the Torah or a sage rabbi to support what they were about to state. Here we read that JESUS was speaking with authority and HE applied HIS message to “everyone.”

HE used the word “looks.” The word “looks” as used in the original Greek means a prolonged or repeated look. It is more than a casual or normal look at a woman or man other than the person’s wife or husband.

Lust raises its head in the Garden of Eden as we read Genesis 3:6:

6 Then the woman saw that the tree was good for food and delightful to look at, and that it was desirable for obtaining wisdom.

The Jewish religious leaders had a strict interpretation of adultery meaning the physical act.

JESUS was addressing the Spirit of the Law, which goes deeper than keeping the letter of the Law. Some may say that they cannot help lusting. JESUS had the cure.

Simply do something about it. Looking upon another person with lust in your heart is a form of an addiction and must be dealt with quickly and kept under control or else it can lead to acting upon it.  Lust is the gateway to envy, coveting, greed, the act of adultery, possible murder, opening oneself to allowing evil into your life and it breaks barriers and eventually destroys. 

JESUS taught that Christians are to deal with lust aggressively.

29 If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of the parts of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. 

My brother-in-law told me of a man in our hometown who was castrated in order to keep him from lusting.

30 And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of the parts of your body than for your whole body to go into hell!

Did JESUS really mean to physically take such drastic action, if necessary yes. The key message is that lust is serious and it is easy to be frivolous about the desire, after all men will be men and women will be women, etc. Lust opens the world to fantasies and fantasies can unknowingly open a person up to the evil one – pornography, unhealthy sexual desires and the list goes on.

Let’s read Matthew 5:31-32:

Divorce Practices Censured

31 "It was also said, Whoever divorces his wife must give her a written notice of divorce. 

Divorce was addressed by Moses as recorded in Deuteronomy 24:1:

1 If a man marries a woman who becomes displeasing to him because he finds something indecent about her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, hand it to her, and send her away from his house. 

JESUS taught in Matthew 19 and pinpointed the problem of divorce:

3 Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?” 

4 “Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ 

5 and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? 

6 So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” (Covenant)

7 “Why then,” they asked, “did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?” 

8 Jesus replied, “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. 

9 I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.” 

The hardness of the heart is the problem. The covenant relationship of marriage has not been taken seriously.

There were two first century schools of teaching from two sage rabbis – Hillel and Shammai. 

The school of Hillel taught that a man could divorce his wife “for any good cause.” If she burned the food or did not iron his shirt like he liked, the husband could divorce his wife. He had to give her a certificate of divorce that was to protect the woman. 

The school of Shammai taught that divorce was permitted only after marital infidelity. JESUS taught that divorce was permitted but not required. JESUS knew the importance of keeping a covenant once cut or made. You can read more about covenant in Genesis 15:17-18:

17When the sun had set and darkness had fallen, a smoking firepot with a blazing torch appeared and passed between the pieces. (Cut pieces)

18 On that day the LORD made a covenant with Abram ----

GOD joins together that which is split apart. When JESUS gave HIS life upon the cross, the curtain that separated the Holy Place from the Most Holy Place in the temple was torn from top to bottom. JESUS gave HIS life by the shedding of HIS blood to establish a new covenant. As a result of the new covenant, as humans, we can all approach GOD directly through faith in JESUS. JESUS stated it well in John 14:6:

6 Jesus told him, "I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.

Salvation is the beginning process of sanctification.

32 But I tell you, everyone who divorces his wife, except in a case of sexual immorality, = fornication, or possibly a violation of Jewish marriage laws causes her to commit adultery. And whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.

GOD spoke through the Prophet Malachi regarding the husband wife relationship and divorce as we read:

Malachi 2:14b and 16:

---- the wife of your marriage covenant

“I hate divorce,” says the LORD GOD of Israel ----

First, marriage is a covenant. GOD does not break the covenants HE “cuts” with HIS children. Second, HE expects HIS children to honor the covenants they make. We see in verse 16 that GOD hates divorce. 

If you want to understand the gravity of “Covenant”, I recommend Kay Arthur’s Bible Study entitled “Covenant, God’s Enduring Promises” published by LifeWay, Nashville, TN.

Divorce is rampant in our world today. Many young people do not see the need to marry because they have witnessed so many, Christian and non-Christian, married couples getting a divorce, mostly their parents. Ideal marriages are few and far between.

Many people confuse lust with love. Lust will wear off when the new wears off. When it wears off, the person or persons begin looking around for another partner. It is the excitement of the pursuit and building a new relationship that is enticing. It is a form of discovery and when discovery ceases, so does the interest. The sad part is such jumping from one person to another never gives true love the opportunity to develop and grow. It is pulling together that builds a relationship. No relationship is free of conflict or the need to work together.

Lust can isolate a person in a relationship as he or she begins to build life with another in their mind, which in turn can lead to acting upon the their lustful thoughts. Keep in mind that the renewing of our minds can take on unhealthy activities. This is whether married or not.  Open communication is vital in any relationship.

A former pastor and counselor told a story about himself. Being a counselor, he knew the symptoms of mid-life crisis. When he recognized the symptoms in his life, he acknowledged them to his wife and asked her to be with him through this period in his life. Working together they got through that period in his life. This too will pass.

The Apostle Paul wrote in 1 Corinthians 10:13:

13 No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to humanity. God is faithful and He will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation He will also provide a way of escape, so that you are able to bear it.

Mid-life crisis can happen to men or women over a broad range of ages. It can last for a short time or a long time. But there are other areas in our lives that can influence a person’s desire to divorce another – abuse (physical, mental, verbal), addictions, poor hygiene, laziness, unforgiving heart and the list goes on.  These and other issues threaten a relationship, especially a marriage covenant, and must be brought to light and dealt with, which may lead to divorce. A man is to love and honor his wife. A true man does not abuse his wife. I hate abuse! This also goes for the woman who abuses her husband. It is all about the heart and your relationship with CHRIST.

JESUS said it best in Matthew 6:33:

33 But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be provided for you.

Seek a personal, intimate, loving relationship with GOD through faith in CHRIST and ask the Holy Spirit to lead, guide and direct your life. Blessings!!!